every other day


18 JAN 06

We have again spent wonderful days together, we the "family." We had a wonderful time skating. And today they took me past the little lonely church to which people can come to pray only on ice skates. (Modersohn-Becker to Rilke, 10 January 1901*) (&*)

I've been working on the final this-is-it version of case sensitive. Tomorrow the manuscript leaves my hands for my publisher's hands. Certain commas have been removed and reinstated more times than I'm willing to admit. So much buried in the text! Only two quotations from Paula Modersohn-Becker remain. When I started writing the book, I thought she would be visible on every page. Her love of the ice! (The ice is visible.)

Actually letting the manuscript go, allowing it to be done, is harder than I thought it would be. The lingering sore throat seems not entirely coincidental.

b&w photo of a self-portrait by Modesohn-Becker

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