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.oar.

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31 AUG 05

There are some useful links regarding New Orleans in Amy King's post today.

29 AUG 05
Dear friend, I can believe in the influence of Mars as fully as I can in the aorta. It's all invisible in a normal day, though felt, as rhythm or excitement or pressure.

Certain tools become valuable.
Relearn to use a notebook.

Moved to action by Matt's comments a while ago, I've begun reading The Sighted Singer, which is really two books: one, transcribed conversations, and the other (Allen Grossman says) a "primer...designed to befriend the reader of poetry (always supposing the reader of poetry needs a hermeneutic friend) by constructing a culture in which poetry is intelligible." I got excited just reading the first table of contents. Tonally the dialogue reminded me, in the beginning especially, of those Krishnamurti books with interviews--that combination of high seriousness with close inspection (in the Q & A form) of what might be unsayable. I'm reading from start to end as well as jumping around in it--the book invites (and rewards) both kinds of attention.

Two statements of Grossman's, from the first few pages:

"Poetry is situated upon the central question of our civilization--how do we know when a person is present?"

"The poem, in my view, is a principle of access: a portal, a gate, a way into the relationship between the speaker and the means he has for making himself visible to others."

Strangely, The Sighted Singer makes a good companion to Susan Howe's The Midnight, which I've been reading & rereading these past few weeks. Totally different in sound and intent, both offer a combination of prose & poetry, history, biography & personal philosophy, "thoughts," a person. The Midnight also has images, including a snapshot of Susan and Fanny Howe as kids. Looking into their faces... one seeming so happy, one so sad (but then, we know the camera's always lying).

27 AUG 05
"one's need to know the shape of life"
"which ends, transforms, and is concordant"
"shapes which console the dying generations"
"what Dante calls the point where all times are present"
(Frank Kermode, The Sense of an Ending)

- The life seemed to go out of it then. A realistic death, in that way.

- The weddings, the funerals... The sound of the powder being thrown on. People are actually living that life! The weddings & the funerals...and they're just in those chairs. Watching. 10 years, 20 years, 30 years of powder.

- What I liked? The conversing with the dead. And the way they were a family reminded me of how my family is. Was.

- After all the times of starting with a death, they started the last show with a birth.

"Too bad you don't believe in anything."

- Those two, god. Mike and Mike. The two Mikes. Those shirts.

- If I hadn't had dreams like that, I'd think: Oh, that's so melodramatic.

- Is it a dream?

"I'll never have what I want."

- It itches. How's she gonna get rid of him?

"What about Mom?"

- Doctor my eyes. That's funny.

"He was never really here."

- He's running behind the car. Like before.

- Man, I've been there.

- In the future, she's younger. She has her hair down.

- And now what?

- Just an ad for Rome.

- That's the first time they ran the credits slow. Like they finally had a chance to say.

- That name I always notice...Rusty Lipscomb. After that I noticed everyone named Rusty.

- It's pretty weird to think about it. You know, really--if you could see the end of everything? It's pretty fucked up. [laughs]

- Sad that they had Keith back in the guard business. Such a boring job--and then he had to get murdered.

- It is sort of dangerous, I guess...being around money.

- That Nate showed up when Ruth was dying was a little bit nice, but it didn't feel true.

- Though it did seem, sometimes, when Bess was dying, that she was looking at someone. And talking to someone we couldn't see.

- It used to seem true in the beginning, with the father.

- Ruth got depressed but the house stayed perfectly clean.

- When David was the other David, that was great. Or when the father was playing cards with Death and Life and Nate. Girlfriends. Ruth and Bettina. Or when Brenda was friends with...I forget her name.

- Some people we didn't see again.

- Most people we won't see again. Of all the people we knew before...one percent. Maybe five percent.

- I guess I felt disappointed in the future they showed. Nobody seemed to do anything much.

- Maybe something happened but you couldn't tell.

- Well, we've had another big night.

- Now we can finally cancel HBO.

25 AUG 05
Some things to look into:

Can making photos help us to see? (As a child I had an imaginary friend who disappeared.)

"St. Vincent de Paul won't take it. The Salvation Army won't take it. Recycling won't take it. The library won't accept it as batteries and it just stands around in the room like an empty skin. You can't throw it into the trash--it's your good name."

The tendency of things to become their opposite. (enantiodromia)

"There is no plot save for their dialogue and dialogue is essentially untrustworthy." (from Lance's first update)

"a social context"
(as in)
who can be represented by art
who can be involved in the making of art
where can art be found

"Somebody might really mean something by this, but we never get to know that. I think it's stupid."  (from Broken Column) "...language binds us to meanings. But the content...is open."
(Ann Lauterbach *)

I'm also interested in: how does a person's life change?

23 AUG 05
Every other day as a daily practice.

"That may be our deepest desire. Not to be private. To be public, open to the world."  (Gerhard Richter)

. . . . . . . . .

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